This happened a few years ago, so we’ll add it to the #weirdbattery only in florida archive (and even the #graymenace ) …
Alleged Noodler Karl Eichner
A man was arrested in Naples after allegedly attacking a woman with a pool noodle. Police say he got mad when she threw his watermelon in the ocean, and he filled up the noodle with sea water and dumped it on his head. He then punched her and authorities got involved. He was charged with misdemeanor battery. According to Collier Clerk records, he skipped his court date, and has not been heard from since… over 5 years on the lam, now.
Michael Herrick mug shot
We’ve had a lot of #weirdbattery cases that we’ve covered on Crimcourts, and quite a few of those have involved food. TSG reports a new one, as Michael Herrick was arrested this week for battery with ramen noodles. Apparently he’ll be claiming self-defense, as he told officers that his boyfriend threw water at him, first.
For the record, throwing water on someone could also be charged as battery. In Florida, battery is any unwanted, unlawful touching.. be it, food, drink or shopping cart.
Sadly, even though The Smoking Gun tracked down the police report, it doesn’t tell us what kind of ramen noodles were involved. I suspect Cup Noodles, but I’ll confess to being a Top Ramen guy…
only in Florida…
- It was a real Shuffle-scuffle!
- 81-year Old charged with Battery
Herbert Hayden- 81
Herbert Hayden, 81, a resident of St. Petersburg, got in an altercation at the Pinellas Park senior center over a game of shuffleboard and was charged with battery. Police allege Hayden struck another man, and that both of their sticks, or cues, as they are known amongst shufflers, were damaged. Unfortunately for prosecutors, officers indicate the “weapons” were not seized for evidence. I do not know how old the victim was, but if he is over 65, Mr. Hayden could potentially be facing a felony for battery on a senior citizen. I have seen prosecutors charge the felony on other senior citizens, but hopefully cooler heads will prevail.
This is the first charge I have seen using a shuffleboard cue as a weapon! #weirdbattery #graymenace
Posted in Criminal Law, Florida, Gray Menace, Tampa Bay area, Uncategorized
Tagged battery, cue, gray menace, herbert hayden, only in florida, shuffleboard, st. petersburg, weirdbattery
Talk about armed and dangerous… (sorry, couldn’t help myself). A Missouri man has been arrested and charged with multiple felonies after he took off his prosthetic arm and beat a couple during a road rage incident. Remarkably, he is already facing charges for doing the same thing to a law enforcement officer back in May.
This attack sounds serious, as one of the victims suffered broken legs from the incident. Bond has been set high this time, and hopefully he sits in jail long enough to learn a lesson this time around.
Remember that scene in Animal House? Everybody remembers the “Food Fight!” scene, right? Remember where the frat guy got hit with food, then he stabbed the girl through the hand with a fork? No? What… it didn’t happen that way? Somebody must be doing food fights wrong…
Carl Smith and Suzanne Hurlvert
Only in Florida… a Crestview woman hit her boyfriend with a half-eaten Taco Bell Burrito Supreme. The man she burritoed, Carl Smith, retaliated by stabbing her in the hand with his fork, and embedded it so deeply that it required surgery to remove. After she got the fork out of her hand, Suzanne Hurlvert was also arrested, and charged with battery for striking Smith with the food item. She’ll be facing a misdemeanor, while Smith will be facing felony aggravated battery charges, and presumptive prison time.
We’ve covered a lot of food batteries here on Crimcourts… even a McChicken, but this is the first burrito I’m aware of! Click here for more weirdbattery
Posted in Criminal Law, Florida, Uncategorized
Tagged battery, burrito, carl smith, crestview, food fight, fork, only in florida, suzanne hurlvert, weirdbattery
- Weird Battery out of Suncoast Estates in North Fort Myers
- Shillelagh, Caulking Gun, and Knife all alleged weapons
A pair of brothers from North Fort Myers were arrested this week for a fight that got out of hand… way out of hand. When deputies responded, they found Daniel Ehrhardt had fresh cuts and bruises, and he reported that his brother had beaten him with a Shillelagh (a Irish stick, sometimes used for walking or fighting). The brother, Karl Ehrhardt, has been arrested for Aggravated Battery.
Man with Shillelagh
When deputies spoke to Karl, he said that his brother attacked him first: starting with fists and then coming at him with knife. Karl says he threw a caulking gun at Daniel, but that didn’t stop him, so he grabbed a shillelagh and struck him. He sustained several cuts from the knife. Daniel claims that after he was beaten, Karl cut himself with the knife to claim self-defense. Witnesses indicated that they did see Daniel with a knife.
Ultimately, Detectives were unable to determine exactly what happened, or who the primary aggressor was, and arrested both brothers. This is probably illegal too, as the Stand Your Ground law states that law enforcement “may not arrest the person for using or threatening to use force unless it determines that there is probable cause that the force that was used or threatened was unlawful.” Fla. Stat. Sec. 776.032(2). How can they say the force was unlawful if they cannot determine who the primary aggressor was? Ultimately, the State is unlikely to determine who was justified, and will be hard pressed to proceed against either brother unless the eyewitnesses prove reliable. #weirdbattery
Posted in Criminal Law, Florida, North Fort Myers / Southwest Florida, Whimsy
Tagged caulking gun, daniel ehrhardt, domestic violence, karl ehrhardt, North Fort Myers, shillelagh, suncoast, weirdbattery
Two (of course these stories have to come from) Florida residents have been arrested in the past week for domestic violence incidents involving food. Both actually stem from Pinellas County.
First, Daniel Plunkett of Treasure Island stands accused of throwing pizza at his roommate. Plunkett, for his part, says that he was actually the victim of the pizza throwing, and the officers did note pizza sauce on his clothing. Unfortunately for him, he is being held without bond as this charge violates his probation.
Meanwhile, just a few days later, Clearwater resident Rykihia Moore was charged with striking her boyfriend with a hamburger she threw. She was up front, admitting to deputies that she did throw the burger and said, “it may have hit him.” Apparently the argument stemmed from concerns that she was being unfaithful.
To say the least, it’s been a busy week in the domestic violence division of Pinellas County, Fla.
Because this is Florida, between the time that I wrote this, and scheduled publication, there has already been another food battery, also with burgers. 19 year old Vero Beach man Tanner Wolf became irate at his father and chucked a McDonald’s bag at him. Wolf also admitted to his crime against family and food. (Thanks @_Floridaman)
Posted in Criminal Law, Florida
Tagged battery, clearwater, daniel plunkett, domestic, hamburger, pinellas, rykihia moore, tanner wolf, treasure island, vero beach, weirdbattery
Brad Davis Mug Shot
Brad Lee Davis killed his own stepfather last year by giving him an “atomic wedgie” (that is, pulling his underwear all the way over his head). The elder man was asphyxiated by the the elastic band from the garment that ended up around his neck. Prosecutors initially sought first-degree murder charges, but reached a deal where Davis plead guilty this week to a lesser charge of first-degree manslaughter. That charge carries a four-year minimum, but prosecutors indicate they are still going to seek a 35-year sentence when the case goes before the judge for sentencing.
And this seems like the rare story that didn’t happen in Florida!
Amy Goldberg mug shot
Boca Raton resident Amy Goldberg was arrested the other day for smearing dog poop on her neighbor. The neighbor’s dog pooped on her yard, and she picked it up and smeared in on the woman as she walked the dog. Unfortunately for Goldberg, the victim is over 65-years old, which means that the charge is a felony battery. #onlyinflorida
Marvin Hill Mug Shot
Ok, in fact, a McChicken Sandwich is not the weirdest implement I have ever heard of. Having been a criminal law practitioner for over a decade now, I have heard some pretty weird ones, and I’ve only been documenting them since I started blogging last year. The worst one that springs to mind was the guy who threw his wife/girlfriend on a bad and started squirting ketchup and mustard all over her. You deal with some messed up stuff in criminal court.
But Tuesday, the McChicken incident happened. Marvin Tremaine Hill, in Des Moines, Iowa lost it over a sandwich. Apparently his wife woke him up to see if he wanted a McChicken sandwich, at which point he became enraged and proceeded to smash said McChicken in her face. He denies attacking her. Burneko at Foodspin has a great take on this.